![]() Having a live-action film function as an outrageous cartoon isn't a problem – Michael gets run over by a car at high speed, shot at violently, and more, and just keeps on ticking – but it would be nice if the action scenes were shot capably or the humor was at least closer to a 50/50 split of hit or miss.Īnd it would be nice if such a film didn't try even for a single scene to go for pathos. (The funniest comes from Reynolds, quipping after Grillo's Interpol agent fires a gun into the ceiling, "What if someone's working upstairs?") But most of the supposedly clever dialogue is nasty, bordering on cartoonishly nihilistic. ![]() With the heavy amount of snarky one-liners, a few of them land, but those that do often feel like improvised lines that just worked in the moment. The cast's vast over-qualification for this film would be less frustrating if director Patrick Hughes or the three screenwriters gave them good material with which to work. (Admittedly, Grant is reprising a role as well, but his appearance is so fast and so baffling that you just hope he got paid well for such a nothing part.) Yes, Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard is notable if for no other reason than Jackson and Freeman, two true acting legends, appear to be sharing the screen for the first time in their respectively lengthy careers. Reynolds, Jackson, and Hayek are all back, yes, but they're joined now by the brightly coiffed Banderas, Frank Grillo, Richard E. Perhaps part of the problem is seeing so many – so many – talented actors slumming for what must have been the prospect of an easy paycheck or a nice time spent in locales like Florence and Rome. These people would be hell to be stuck with on a long road trip. Though this movie is mercifully 20 minutes shorter than its predecessor, it's just as endless. Jackson's character Darius mocks Michael, Michael mocks Darius, they yell at each other, Sonia shouts a bit too, and so on and so on. Here, swearing is like breathing, or more accurately, it's used in place of actual jokes. There's nothing like the good, effective, shockingly funny use of profanity in movies, but unfortunately, this is nothing like the good, effective, shockingly funny use of profanity. Jackson's known for his utility with the f-word, and in this film, he's matched by Hayek in the sheer amount of profanity throughout.
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